Interviewing

I recieved a call yesterday from a large bank down here in South Florida about a job I've been waiting a month to hear back from. It's doing financial analysis on large corporations (i.e. number-crunching monkey). I'm really excited to see what the job is all about. Now I just have to schedule a time to go in and interview.

I've never been a big fan of the interview process. To me interviewing is a necessary evil. It's an inevitably long, drawn-out process. Mostly you sit while they ask you meaningful questions like, "Why should I hire you?" or "What qualifications do you have?". I find that the younger the interviewer, the more they tend to ask annoying probing questions like "Define your skill sets", or my personal favorite, "Who are you?" Regardless of the stupidity of their question, you are obliged to answer all of them. Sarcasm usually does not go over well in interview settings. I don't really know why that is because after all, humor releases tension. It could be because interviewers don't really have a sense of humor. They are too busy thinking of their next burning philosophical question.

I think interviews could be shorter and more to the point. A friend of mine had to take a 20 minute written psychological exam as part of an interview. WTF? I have been on some pretty bizarre interviews so anything they throw at me shouldn't be a big suprise. Anyways I will update you with the progress.

links
Move over bass; man catches 124 lb. catfish
86 yesr-old NC woman arrested for harassing 911
Why do people horde 250 cats?

Hollywood Update

Last weekend I saw the last "episode" of the Star Wars saga, The Revenge of the Sith. I'm not going to bore you with a long review but I think it had great special effects as well as a good story. And except for the girl behind me kneeing me in the back it was an enjoyable movie. I also saw Paris Hilton's new movie, House of Wax. Minus the predictable plot and stupid ending the movie wasn't that bad. There were a lot of gratuitous shots of female anatomy which were appreciated. Paris Hilton plays the role of a dumb skank to perfection. She also does in the movie as well (da da tsssh).

Time magazine released its list of 100 Top Movies this week. I could tell that the list was made up by middle-aged people just based on the time period of the picks. I don't think the list is too bad but some people complained that classics like The Sound of Music weren't in there. I thought Caddyshack or Animal House could've gotten a nod. I guess the reviewers weren't comedy fans. It's all subjective anyway; of course it's going to upset some people. Some people think The Godfather is the greatest movie of all-time, other people like Freaky Friday.

Which leads me to my next story, it seems Lindsay Lohan has seen better times. Every gossip column is talking about her thin frame and constant "colds". I saw a picture of her and yeah she looks skinnier and probably is a coke head. But who the hell really cares? She's still a teenager, comes from a messed up family and gets chased around by autograph-seekers and paparatzi all day. What else do you expect? It's not like she's making x-rated home videos of herself....yet.
*new babes added*

links
Light saber duel leaves two critically injured
Maybe a sign you should quit smoking
Md. Man catches 52 pound bass
Woman awarded $10M over perfume allergy

Truisms

I was looking at a page of some truisms this afternoon. A truism is a statement of obvious truth. Some of these are pretty funny:

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

Opinions are like assholes, everyone's got one.

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

Half the people you know are below average.

Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.

Money can't buy love. But it CAN rent a very close imitation.

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.

Don't sweat petty things... or pet sweaty things.

Eagles may soar, but weasels aren't sucked into jet engines.

No one is listening until you make a mistake.

Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.

Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

That's all I will share with you because reading too many of these gets real tiresome. Most of these are suprisingly accurate. I like the one about swearing and driving. Truisms remind me of "Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey", the skit that they used to do on Saturday Night Live. Sometimes I'll think up some truisms without even trying-then I forget them. If I remember any I will post them up. TGIF baby!

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Lake disappears overnight in Russia..WTF?
What age do you act?
Unusual looking creatures of the deep sea
Wendy's lady paid $50 for chili finger..that's really messed up

"They're real and they're spectacular...."

Giddy up!
Season 4 of "Seinfeld" was released in a 4-disc DVD set starting today. This season contains episodes like "The Junior Mint", "The Virgin", "The Bubble Boy" and "The Smelly Car," where a valet infests Jerry's car with his horrible B.O. Some of the episodes on this season are classic Seinfeld comedy. I have to go out and get this set- I didn't know there were so many shows (24) in just this one season! I got the first three seasons on DVD from my sister for Christmas last year. It's great to have when there's nothing on t.v. or when you are fiending to watch it.

Larry David's Curb Your Enthusiasm is about as close to Seinfeldian humor as you can get on t.v. these days but it's not exactly the same. When I watch Seinfeld now I can see certain parts that are clearly Larry David's mind at work. I do like watching Curb, as some people call it, even though I suck and don't have HBO.

You know one show I never got into was Everybody Loves Raymond. All the ads made it sound like a ton of people watched it but no one I knew liked it at all. He won a bunch of awards though so somebody must have been watching. I felt kinda the same way about The Drew Carey Show. I gave it a chance but I just didn't find it funny. I liked Friends for the first few seasons but it lost its comedic edge quickly and rested on its laurels for too long after that.

There is a lack of watchable sitcoms these days because writing good comedy isn't easy. Or there could be great writers but the acting isn't there. The antics of Kramer, the idiosyncracies of Elaine and the dead-pan comedy of George couldn't be replicated by any other combination of actors. The personalities of the actors on Seinfeld is what made the show more funny even beyond the script. Hopefully there will be some new show that combines good writing and good acting and doesn't get overhyped and overcommercialized in the process.
*New babes added*

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Star Wars Personality Test..apparently I'm Han Solo
Return of the bun snatchers
Cool picture of the 'Sombrero Galaxy'
Damn I gotta get married soon or else

Why I hate clowns

Do you ever get the feeling that someone is staring at you? Like if they stared any harder they could burn a hole through you? As I was driving home today I felt a stare coming from the next lane over. It was a clown driving a big white van staring at me-and not in a nice way. It had the hair, the makeup, the oversized bowtie and the whole get-up. The van passed me and then cut me off. For no reason. That brings me to my point: I hate clowns.

What are clowns good for? Even as a kid I never found them funny. They wear too much makeup and dress like total assholes. Sometimes they have a talent like making balloon animals or juggling but mostly they just act like idiots. I am puzzled by the fact that some people invite (and even pay for) these morons to show up for special events like their kid's birthday.

Clowns can't be trusted because they are grown ups dressed in bright colored clothing, a big red nose and huge clown shoes. There is something very suspicious about that. The thing that frightens me is that clowns are always supposed to be happy. There's no way that anyone is comfortable, let alone happy in those outfits and all that makeup. There's a reason why you don't see ads for angry clowns or melancholy clowns. Because a non-happy clown is really scary and potentially very dangerous. I remember watching the Stephen King movie "It" when I was a kid. For a year afterwards my best friend's little sister always had to have someone in the bathroom with her. It was a scary movie because it shows what a clown gone wrong can really do.

In conclusion, clowns are just people with a mask on. They are not the happy, go-lucky characters they claim to be. Even though some people may find them cute or amusing, I can't stand them. Unless they get hurt or sever a body part, clowns will never make me laugh. So go and cry sad clown, there is no love for you here.

links
A quiz for you Caddyshack fans
Dave Chappelle alive and well in S. Africa
"Super-Size-Me" rebuttal film?
Where's my invitation dude?

wow

I added a new feature to the site; it's called the "Babes o' the week" which I will update every wednesday or thereabouts with three new babes. For the inagurual week I am proud to feature Sofia, Josie and Willa. Enjoy!





It's over there =========================================>>>>

Hump day!

What a babe. Cora from www.sportsbybrooks.com. 

Supercool

I have always been a big fan of grilling out. Especially during this time of year when the weather is nice and the sun is out a lot later. For me, the smell of sizzling meat is synonymous with summertime. I will grill anything: hamburgers, chicken, steak, shish kebabs, ribs, whatever. But I only have one rule: I always have and always will only use a charcoal grill. The gas grillers will tell you that charcoal is messy, dirty and doesn't cook evenly. But I will tell you that the food tastes much better using a charcoal grill. That brings me to the coolest invention around: the chimney starter. Until last week I'd never heard of this, but it is the most practical $10.99 I've spent in a long time.

For the past week, the chimney starter has been a topic of conversation with friends and even strangers. I've been labeled a dork for making such a big deal about it but I don't care. This has revolutionized the way I grill forever. The best part is that there's no lighter fluid! The way it works is that you fill the cylinder with charcoal, crumple a couple pieces of newspaper, set in your grill, place the paper underneath the contraption, and light with a match. About twenty minutes later all the coals are orangy hot and ready to go. I think I might use it tonight. I'm getting psyched just talking about it. Ok so maybe I do sound like a dork.

links
Schwartzenegger, moon kiss and make up
Whoa! Watch your step
Tons of pictures of gorgeous SoCal women
Teen can't eat his way out of this one
FREE Wendy's frosties nationwide this weekend. No joke.

Bolton, minus Kenny G

He looks like a cross between Wilford Brimley and Janet Reno. He also shares his last name with one of the greatest heads of hair in the 1980's. His name: John Bolton.

And he is President Bush's nominee for the new head of the United Nations. Going into this post I didn't know much about this guy. Then I read this post by Larry David and I vowed to learn more about this UN situation.

John Bolton is a Yalie who has served in many governmental organizations throughout his career including the State Department, the U.N., Justice Department and USAID. He is currently a member of the Council on Foreign Relations and has been the Undersecretary of State for Arms Control since May 2001. Most notably Bolton had made enemies of two rising nuclear powers, Iran and North Korea. He's vehemently opposed by Democrats in Congress for his nomination to the UN. He is blunt and has a no nonsense, to-the-point attitude. Bolton has said, "The Secretariat (UN) building in New York has 38 stories. If it lost ten stories, it wouldn't make a bit of difference." Needless to say Bolton will give this place a No. 1 haircut.

The UN has been marred with scandal for the past few years, tarnishing the reputation of the world's preeminent international body. There was the sex trade scandal in Kosovo, sex abuse allegations in Burundi, the documented abuses of young Congolese girls. The glaring failure of the Oil for Food Program in Iraq, where UN money intended for humanitarian use was ciphoned off by Saddam Hussein and other high-ranking government officials. There was yet another scandal implicating Kofi Annan's son, Kojo, in profiteering from the Oil-for-Food debacle.

So drastic reform is needed badly. Cuts in administrative spending and strict reforms in the conduct and oversight of UN employees are pressing issues. Like other large bureaucratic institutions, these cuts will probably not be recieved well and possibly resisted.

Is Bolton the right person for the job? There's no doubt he will get the job done but he doesn't possess the tact that is necessary for dealing with foreigners- especially Europeans. Prevailing UN protocol consists of careful tip-toeing and sugar-coated diplomacy. The brash, aggressive style of Bolton will ultimately clash with the relaxed culture of the UN.

The most important issue is ensuring that the UN retains its effectiveness in the future. Relations are one thing but progress is another. If that means ruffling a few feathers, then so be it. His message won't be as pretty as When a Man Loves a Woman , but it will surely be heard loud and clear.

Super Size This

I finally got around to watching the documentary "Super Size Me" about a guy eating nothing but McDonalds for a month straight. Most people I know rushed to see this when it was in the theatres. The movie wasn't really a shocker. It's not like he was going to get skinnier from eating only McDonalds for a month. Or suddenly grow massive calf muscles.

I was a little disappointed because I expected him to get really fat really quickly and that just didn't happen. He did end up gaining 25 lbs in a month and developing severe liver problems. Some of the data that was mentioned in the movie probably wasn't as big of a deal as they made it out to be. There is a guy in the movie that has eaten over 10,000 Big Macs in his lifetime. That is a lot of special sauce.

It was a worthy cause, but this newfound information still won't change my eating habits. I do like eating healthy but I also enjoy being a dirt bag and narfing on Mickey D's every now and then. Fortunately I don't eat there enough for it to cause liver damage or McDonald's body odor. I wouldn't touch another McNugget again. But an apple pie never hurt anybody.

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In other news, Tommy Lee no longer allowed in zoos
Happy guy in a red shirt
You just can't stop Jesus and his miracles
The question is: was porn involved?

That sucks, bitch!

"In a surprise announcement Wednesday, Comedy Central said that the highly anticipated third season of Dave Chappelle's show will not make its May 31 premiere date. "Comedy Central has suspended production on the third season of Chappelle's Show until further notice," network spokesman Tony Fox said in a brief statement. "All parties are optimistic that production will resume in the near future." No official reason was given for the shutdown, but sources told E! News that Chappelle has been MIA from the set for weeks. Chappelle's publicist declined to comment, referring reporters to the Comedy Central statement."

Say it ain't so Dave! I enjoy watching Chappelle's Show on Comedy Central and it's too bad that the show will be delayed. Hopefully they will still decide to do at least part of the season. I heard that Dave is "ill" with something but neither Comedy Central nor Chappelle spokesmen will say anything further. There is no news about this on his website. I wonder if Charlie Murphy would consider doing something even if the show turns out to be cancelled. This cracka would watch it.

Feliz Cinco de Mayo!

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'Runaway Groom': who cares?
Holmes: could be stubble rash
Booty shaking outlawed?
Coolest cereal prize ever

Separated at birth?

Ouch...

 
This is a follow-up to one of my earlier posts.
Tommy, do you know what you've gotten into??? I think Scientology would say you can't fix that. I don't know what it is on that lip but it don't look good. The herp?
This is part of an article at Gawker.com. More later...

President Bashir and the Inner Circle of Death

Omar Bashir. A religious man.

What comes to mind when you think of Sudan?
Desert? Terrorists? The middle of nowhere?
Or maybe an even better question: who cares?

I've have been reading many articles about the crisis in the Darfur region of Sudan during the past year but never really thought much about the size and scope of it. After reading this article I thought I would do a post about it.

Do you know that almost 400,000 people are estimated to have died at the hands of the Sudanese government in the past two years and between three to four million people have been displaced from their homes? That's twice the death toll from last year's tsunami and more than twenty times that amount driven from the area. That's not even mentioning the people affected by beatings, rapes, disfigurement and permanent physical and emotional injuries caused by the region's Janjaweed. This militia, comprised of Arabs armed with automatic weapons riding on horseback, is killing off Christian blacks in the southern region of Sudan. Their goals are to take their property and either kill or drive them away. This is not just disputes over land- it is systematic, government-sponsored racial and religious cleansing.

The millions of refugees, forced from their homes, are caught in the middle of a war between ethnic black Africans, the Janjaweed and other government-supported militias. Some of these refugees have little access to food or water shown in these satellite images. The neighboring countries of Uganda, Chad, Ethiopia, Congo and Kenya provide safety from the militias but the regions themselves are arid desert and not able to support the vast number of people. The UN and other agencies are in those areas helping refugees but no permanent fixes are available until more funding arrives from either the UN, the European Union or the US. At this point, all three are stalling. Meanwhile, the situation for refugees deteriorates.

The main culprits causing this disaster are the president of Sudan and head of the National Islamic Front, Omar Hassan Bashir and the vice-president, Ali Muhammad Taha. These two are the kingpins of the "Inner Circle", a small group of two ruling tribes, of which both men belong. Since the party gained power in 1989, it has stood for creating an Islamist, theocractic state. The government has already imposed sharia, or Islamic law, over northern Sudan and is trying to convert the country's non-Muslim population (mostly southern blacks) to Islam. Funded by newly developed oil reserves, the government has more money, resolve and a tighter grip on the country than ever before.

Recent news reports suggest that some members of the Janjaweed have been punished and have had body parts amputated in response to the violence and international outcry. The government says instances like this show the problem is over. I doubt anything has changed and that the "Islamification" of Sudan will continue bringing more violence, death and famine to an already vulnerable people.

Blast that terrorist scum!

That's what I find myself saying Monday nights. At least since the FOX show "24" started up again. I've been watching every week since the first episode of this season debuted and I'm hooked. This is the first season that I have seen of this series. All the computers, phones and all of Jack Bauer's equipment are supercool. This is one show that I look forward to every week which says a lot because I haven't had a t.v. series that I watched religiously for a while. I might go to Blockbuster one of these days and rent some old episodes from season three to get caught up.

I never thought about how difficult it must be to try and film a show that has to have each episode fit seamlessly with the previous one. I heard that the wardrobe and the makeup are particularly hard to keep straight. For those of you that aren't familiar with the show I recommend you watch it sometime. I think there are only three or four episodes left but every one has been entertaining and is definitely worth a look.

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That's a big burger
Human 'monkey-man' terrorizes neighborhood
I don't even want to think of the logistics
How would you like this lady as your neighbor?

There's Waldo!

 
A missing Duluth, GA woman, 32 year-old Jennifer Wilbanks, was discovered at a local 7-11 by Albequerque police Saturday after a frantic phone call to 911 in which she claimed she was kidnapped. Wilbanks stated she was taken by a man and a woman driving a blue van. "I have no idea. I don't know where I am," said Wilbanks, whose story was later found to be bogus. In actuality Wilbanks boarded a Greyhound bus bound for Las Vegas and after her week-long disappearance, eventually wound up in New Mexico.

This sounds like a case of a woman with cold feet. That combined with a spur-of-the-moment escape plan. Whatever it was, it doesn't look like it was well thought out. I bet there was something else going on in that story that probably won't come out. Will she still get married? Would a nervous breakdown/national hoax be a deal-breaker in an engagement? If she was willing to flee across seven states to get away, that's a pretty big statement.

The truth is, no one knows what entirely was going on and we probably won't know either. It's a good thing that she was recovered safely and wasn't in any physical harm during her disappearance. She probably shouldn't get in trouble for doing this even though it did turn out to waste a lot of people's time and energy. This reminds me of that college girl they found in a swamp in Wisconsin a couple of years ago. Both women turned out to be fine, which is the most important thing. They both looked crazier than a dog shittin tacks in their pictures too--with that same twenty mile stare. Interesting story- I'm sure we will hear a lot more about it in the weeks to come.

links
Holmes/Cruise: I rest my case
Man I gotta get a new cell phone
Do your ears itch? Then you might wanna read this.
News of the Weird
Jail or Packers tickets