The Pope (El Papa)

So the old guys with the long robes and big hats are going to elect a new pope in the coming days or weeks. Does anyone know how long this conclave process takes? If I were flown to Italy, put up in a nice resort and given good food, I wouldn't want to leave either. It's probably like Club Med for these guys. Then once they are finished, they announce their decision by burning some substance that gives off white smoke. I doubt it's just the "ballots" they're burning up in there..Call me a conspiracy theorist but God just might have some powerful grow lights underneath St. Peter's Square..
If I were to talk just about myself, no one would probably read this. I took a look at some blogs last night and it was mostly pointless rambling about someone's depression or their suicidal friend..yikes. So I will say this now, I will talk about happenings in my life as soon as it gets interesting. Deal?
links:
How to win Miss USA 2005: "I fell in love with them and it snowballed"
I thought he would have faded into Bolivia..but you need money to do that